Monday, November 30, 2009

Valerie's Photo Shoot in Downtown Lawrenceville


I have an inner flower child!

I love the old buildings and the FALL! Georgia is really one of the most beautiful places on Earth
I love this picture! But I think that I am finally looking older . . . which I am not sure I like :(
This is my buddy from college Valerie . . . I love this crazy sister in Christ.
We thought that this was so interesting. We wanted to sign up for the snowflake tea as well!
We have been keeping in touch for the last 9 years!
Me and my love enjoying a little piece of fall.

Talked with the bitrhmom!

It was funny I felt like I was talking to myself, similar voice and same awkward laugh. Strange but I felt better knowing she was just as nervous as I was. But everything is still on schedule, which also makes me feel better!

Something cool though, she is going to get a 4-D ultrasound done and is going to have the sex of the baby found out for us, then she is going to have it taped and me and my family are going to have a little party and all find out together! I can't wait.

So all is good and we are so excited!!'

Jen

Hopefully tonight is the night!!

At 7pm there is a scheduled phone call to talk to the birthmom. I just hope that my larygitis/sniffling/coughing won't be a hindrance. I better start drinking my hot green tea to sooth out the vocal chords. But I am not nervous at the moment, I think that after 2 fake out calls I am ready to really talk to her tonight!

But to update a little bit, Erick and I returned from Georgia last night after spending a lovely week with our friends. It was perfect weather, the friends were amazing, and the scenery was oh so breath-taking. I will download some picures when I can find where my camera is hiding.

So be ready! My friend Valerie conducted a photo shoot and the pictures are sure to be awesome!

Jen
(sorry if this is all over the place Iam a little congested and medicated :) )

Friday, November 13, 2009

We met with the birthmom's mom

We still have not gotten the chance to communicate with the birthmom, but Erick and I were able to meet her mom. After the meeting we felt very reassured that God is still in control and that God still has a plan for us.


We also found out last night that God decided that it was time for out friend Avery to go home to be with Him. We are all shocked because he was a young guy. It really goes to show you that we do not know the time or day when we will leave this Earth. You also can not put off spending time with people you haven't seen in a long time. You don't want to have any regrets. So we need to live a life every day that shows Jesus Christ to the people we are around. Avery did that, when you were in his presence you left knowing that this man knows the Lord and loves the Lord. We need to uplift his family, his wife Joy. I am ready to see how the Lord works in all of this confusion. We don't know the Lords plan, but He has one.


Jen

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

So what happened?

The agency forgot to call us. I guess they had a high risk birthmom that they had to find new housing for, and the phone call was forgotten. So tonight... will be the call.
I am glad to know that it wasn't the birthmom calling off the call. So now I have to wait again until 9pm.

Gives some of you more time to lift us up in prayer.

Jennifer

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Trying to pass some time

As I am writing this post I am awaiting a three way call from the adoption agency and the birth mom. It is thirty minutes past the time that they were supposed to call. I have never had butterflies like the ones that I have had all day. I keep thinking, whoa I am about to talk to the mom that is willing to give me her baby for the rest of my life. Isn't that unreal. Then I think "oh crap what am I going to say to her?" I mean I hate talking on the phone anyways. It just has always been something that I have never gotten into. I mean I hate to even order pizza.

How am I going to react? Is there going to be an overflow of emotions? Am I going to start crying? Is she going to start crying? If she did I would definitely lose it, I would probably try to talk her into keeping her baby just so that she wouldn't be sad anymore.

The thing is, if they don't call I can understand that. I won't be mad, I just really don't want to go through another day of waiting to talk to her, and imagining what to say to her, and what she is going to say to me.

Sooo... I was hoping that as I was typing this the phone would ring, I would freak out and then type phone is ringing and leave you hanging. But no the phone has not rang. So if you read this pray for a good conversation, and pray that I can make it through the plague of butterflies that entangle my intestines in anticipation!

Jen

Monday, November 9, 2009

I told the faculty today!

Mr Rider allowed me to share with the group how the Lord is working in my life (and Erick).

I told them that for the last 3 1/2 year I have been limiting God. Telling him that I only wanted my own biological child, and that nothing else would be good enough for me! Ahh what was I thinking having this mind set?? I was telling God "Please don't bless me in ways that are better than my own measly thoughts. Please God let me sit and wallow in my self pity and my self worthlessness, constantly getting frustrated with my own desires that I can not fulfill on my own."
I kick myself to have gone through this for soooo long. At least it feels like so long. I pray that you are not limiting God in some avenue in your life. What you need to do is start to pray, Lord you know better than me, so please do your thing!
It may not happen right away but BAM when it happens you know that it is only from God, because no one could work the plans and put the right people together at the same time, place, and all have the same mindset!

GOD IS AMAZING! Don't forget that!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Our birthmother letter

We were asked by our agency to write a letter to our birthmother and I thought that some of you would like to read it,


Dear Jennifer,

My husband Erick and I wanted to quickly introduce ourselves, and get a couple pictures out to you before we have our first phone call. First of all, we can not truly express how thankful we are for this gift you are giving to our family. Since we are going to have the opportunity to talk, I wanted to tell you our story as to how we got to this point in our lives. I'll start with when Erick and I got married. Erick and I met in a church college and career group, and when Erick said that he first saw me he knew that he wasn't going to like me because I was wearing an Ohio State shirt (ironic :)). But actually 3 months after we met we were engaged, and 7 months later we were married! Erick and I have been married for 3 1/2 years, and since day one we have been trying to get pregnant. I actually did not work our first year of marriage because I thought that we would be pregnant right away. We understand that God often times has different plans for our life, and He doesn't always share these plans with us.

Believing that God is in control and that He must have something better for us, we felt it was time that I looked for a job. He opened the door to a great Christian Academy where I became the main science teacher, and I have been doing this for the last 2 1/2 years. If it was not for this job I would not have met my friend Sue. Sue and I started a group at our church called "Holding onto HOPE." This is a group for women who are infertile, where they can come together and learn to trust in God during this situation instead of turning from Him. We know how easy it is to feel that God is not there during infertility, and times of discomfort. During the year that we have had this group we have had many ladies come in and give their testimony about how God either opened their womb, or they adopted through Foster care, or just adopted through an agency.

During this time Erick and I had begun our process of going to an infertility doctor and we found out that unless we have an IVF (in-vitro fertilization - baby made in the lab and then placed in my belly) we would never get pregnant on our own. Having trust in God was the only thing that did not send me into a depression after finding out about that news. Knowing that there are children in the world that are already born, or about to be born that need a mom or dad, we started to look into adoption. Our search stopped abruptly because the financial aspect of it would not work for us. We then, seeing the need and understanding that there are millions of children in the foster care system that need a mom or dad to love on them until their parents can amend some of the mistakes that they made, we decided to sign up for our licensees. We are actually still in the process in which we are waiting for them (because our government believes that since my husband and I are young (27), we will skip town with the babies we watch?? Isn't that crazy) but we have decided that until we are blessed with our adopted baby we wanted to still help with the foster program.

In the time that we have been going through the foster drama, as I think of it :) , my friend Sue had been telling some people in the church about our group and how God is working through different scenarios like the hope of adopting through foster care. This is the part that began to rock our world! Sue met this couple, whom she told about Erick and I, wanting to adopt through foster care, and they asked why we were not adopting through an agency. She explained that it was because of finances, and they said that that should not be a hinderance, and they offered to PAY for the entire adoption for us! Wow thank you GOD. So a couple days after Sue talked to this family, Sue told me that I needed to start looking for an agency. I started looking at agencies that had the word Hope in them, and came across Hope for Families. Two days later Lynn and Ken Brown were at our house doing the home-study! The next day we learned about you! God's hand has been guiding us to this moment since the beginning of time, and it blows my mind to see how His plan is nothing that we could have orchestrated. So literally with in a week, I found out about this family and their financial contribution, found Hope for families, and then found out about you! Isn't God awesome!

We feel that the timing can not be any better either, the baby will be born near the end of the school year, which I will be able to take the rest of it off, and then I will have the whole summer off as well! The joy of being a teacher!. We know that this has got to be one of the hardest decisions you have ever had to make. . . EVER! And we are not taking that lightly. We just wanted to give you the HOPE that your baby will be entering into a family that has been waiting and praying for a miracle to happen. Not to mention all of our parents who have been eagerly waiting for a grandchild. So thank you Jennifer, thank you from the bottom of our hearts!

Know that we are praying for you and hope that your current situation with your job and health will improve. We are also lifting your children and family up in prayer as well. I enclosed some pictures so you can put a face with a name, and when we talk you will be able to put a face with a voice.

Lastly, I wanted to leave you with a verse, actually our Holding onto Hope verse. Psalms 71:14 "But as for me, I will hope continually, and will praise you more and more."

Sincerely,
Jennifer and Erick

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Big decisions

Today I went and had a talk with my Head Administrator, and told him that Erick and I would not be able to go on the Senior trip to Greece and Turkey. I didn't put the dates of the trip together with the birth of the baby. The baby is due on the 1st of April, the trip starts on March 25 and goes through the 7th of April. I do not want to miss the birth of the baby or the first week of the baby! You can't get those days back, you know!
The birthmom's mother is in town, and I will be meeting with her in the next week or so.
I am still waiting to learn the sex of the baby!!! Ahh I can't wait.

Jen